I feel so overwhelmed.
I thought I was going to have a little sea of calm between Relay for Life stuff and summer bellydance performances. I was soooo very wrong.
So, I have a performance mid-July, three in the first 9 days of August (actually four if you consider that we are two sets on one of the days in August). And I am supposed to be organizing/putting together the zombie thing (from scratch) in October. Eek!
I don't have my costumes put together yet, which is stressing me out, especially since things aren't working terribly well regarding putting them together. I keep running into hurdles, like the fabric store running out of the fabric I need. D'oh.
And my trip to Okeelahoma was canceled for this weekend. So, I'm stuck here. I really wanted to get out of town and visit somewhere new for a little bit. I need a break, a refresher, something to restart my failing engine. *sigh*
Oh well. I shall carry on anyhow.
Hopefully I learn to stop stretching myself so thin after this. :p
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4 comments:
That´s good!! ... it´s a nice feeling to be occupied with stuff, even though you feel a bit overworked from time to time. There will be a day when boredom takes hold of you, don´t you worry.
Just make sure you get enough sleep, at least 7-8 hours a night, that´s when your body recovers. So very important!! Lack of sleep, I´m talking quality-sleep at nights here, is the main source for being burnt out and get an exhaustion syndrome (as we call it over here), so take care of your nights. :-) ... and you needn´t worry.
Next year there will be new interesting things to do, whatever you do don´t stop! ...just maybe slow it down a bit now and then, and if you need to put the breaks on, be sure to start the engine up as soon as possible but in the first gear to begin with. That was my big mistake, I stopped everything and now it´s impossible to start it all up again.
Good point about putting it in first gear when starting up again... I tend to overdo things and jump in way too quickly.
It would probably help if I were getting decent sleep, but I'm not. :( I'm not sleeping much, and when I do I have nightmares. I had lots of weird ones last night/this morning.
Anyway, definitely planning on scaling back soon. If I don't, I'm going to throw my hands in the air and walk away from everything. And that wouldn't really be healthy either. But I'm getting close to that point. I just don't want to deal with it all anymore.
Well decent sleep, or not. You´re still quite young, you´ll deal with it. I felt a change coming gradually around the age of 32-34... when I became somewhat exhausted and started to stay in bed at abnormal times, for no reason at all but that I felt tired, and to some extent I lost my good mood for staying up.
You have to do something about the nightmares though, that thing worries me. There is probably some trauma that still hasn´t become clear to you.
I´ve recently started having nightmares to, but I on the other hand know why. Last night I dreamed my daughter disappeared, she couldn´t be found anywhere. Then I had a dream our house took fire, and that one I understand completely.
I heard some time ago someone saying if you have dreams when fire occurs you are surely in love, the bigger flames the deeper in love. ;-)
You are right... my nightmares are oftentimes trauma-based. Sometimes they are just about current stressors, but because I have so many trauma-based ones (and I have other problems because of trauma), I am going to start TFCBT (Trauma-Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) in my therapy sessions soon. It sounds frightening because we are going to dig up a lot of my traumatizing past experiences and try to deal with them. In fact, it is downright scary and overwhelming, but if it works, I should be MUCH better off when it's all said and done. I'm hoping I am able to do it. It's not so much a matter of "if" but of "when" I will be able. I'm not sure I am ready yet, but I'm more ready than I have ever been and I think this is a very opportune time to do such a thing (other than not having a whole lot of outside support from friends/family nearby).
I think the problem with me spreading myself too thin is that those things start to feel like a burden of obligation rather than fun activities that I want to be involved in (which is how they all started, but they evolve into obligations soon after I begin them). I need to find non-obligatory hobbies, I think. Things that I can do as I please, rather than on a schedule/deadline that is always sooner than I am ready for.
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